


One In The Boiling Hot Lava

by marshmallowsandmangoskins



Category: Nothing Much to Do
Genre: Alternate Universe - Stripper/Exotic Dancer, M/M, Swearing, pedrazar
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-01
Updated: 2014-11-01
Packaged: 2018-02-23 13:45:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 862
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2549729
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/marshmallowsandmangoskins/pseuds/marshmallowsandmangoskins
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Balthazar didn’t belong here, he knew it. It felt like the inside of a volcano, it was just so hot. There were too many lights and sounds and people. And not enough clothes. Not that he thought there was anything wrong with people taking their clothes off to music for money, it just wasn’t something he found enjoyable to watch."<br/>Balthazar meets a performer at a strip club and sparks fly.</p>
            </blockquote>





	One In The Boiling Hot Lava

**Author's Note:**

> Oh my god I suck at summaries.  
> Pedrazar stripper AU, because why the heck not! Everyone is above 18 and fully consenting adults.

Balthazar didn’t belong here, he knew it. It felt like the inside of a volcano, it was just so hot. There were too many lights and sounds and people. And not enough clothes. Not that he thought there was anything wrong with people taking their clothes off to music for money, it just wasn’t something he found enjoyable to watch. He was more of a stay at home and write songs kind of guy. He also couldn’t understand why they cranked the heat up so much. But his friend Meg had just broken up with her boyfriend Robbie (for the third, and hopefully last, time) and he really wanted to help her. He promised he would pick her up from work and take her out to a late movie to cheer her up. That is, if he could find her.

He wandered around the large room trying to find a backstage or dressing room type area. He saw a black curtain near the back and decided to see if she was there. He was about to step through until a hand shot out and bumped him in the chest. He followed the arm and looked to the person attached.

The man was slightly taller and wearing a sailor’s uniform with a bit less fabric than usually used in the navy. He had floppy, dirty blond hair that looked really smooth. Balthazar wondered what it would be like to run his hands through it. Maybe they could—

“Sorry, performers only back there.” The comment made him snap back to reality. “Are you lost? Maybe I can help you.”

“Oh…uh,” he stammered. Why was he here again? Oh right, “Meg!” He didn’t mean to shout. “I’m here to pick up my friend Meg,” he said softer, but still loud enough to be heard over the music. “Do you know her?”

“Ahh yes,” he responded with a chuckle and a sigh, “The Queen of Scream. She has that really hot boyfriend, right? What was his name again?”

“Robbie,” he answered with a scowl, “and they broke up.”

“Congratulations! You’ve just passed my test.”

The musician stared back with confusion.

“You see, a lot of guys come back here, claiming they know someone, trying to get backstage,” the performer explained, “but you obviously know Meg because of the face you made when talking about her douchey ex-boyfriend. And you don’t seem like the kind of guy who would try to sneak backstage to pick up chicks.”

Balthazar didn’t really know what to say, he just blushed. They both stared at each other, music surrounding them. For the first time since entering, he felt safe. It was no longer hot and stifling, but warm and cozy, like a loving embrace. Everything was perfect with this strange new guy. Maybe Balth could even work up the courage to do something he’d usually never dare. He could go out on a limb, ask him out. He opened his mouth to speak but no sound came out. The other man spoke instead.

 “Anyway, I still can’t let you back there. You wanna give me a name and I’ll let her know you’re here?”

“Uh, yeah, sure,” Balth stammered. He paused, getting an eyebrow raise from the other gentleman. “Oh right, the name. It’s Balthazar.”

“Strange,” he replied, “I like it.”

This was answered with a deeper blush and a tiny smile. He was about to return the question when the black curtained opened with a swoosh.

“I have emerged!” Meg announced, “It is I, the Queen. Here to grace you with my presence.”

“Hello your majesty,” Balth responded with a bow. His conversation partner quickly joining in the gesture. “How may I be of service?”

“Well,” she started listing off on her fingers, “I need a shit ton of ice cream, a shit ton of vodka, a designated driver, and a best friend.”

“Then I’m your guy,” he replied with a chuckle and a smile.

All of a sudden, a voice grew over the loudspeaker. “Next up on the Main Stage,” it announced, “Club Messina is proud to present, The Captain!”

“Well, that’s my cue,” the sailor interjected, “I’ll just leave you to it, then.”

“Bye,” Meg singsonged, leaving him with a parting hug.

Balth waved shyly.

“So,” Meg gushed as soon as he was out of earshot, “what’s going on with you and the Captain?”

“It’s noth—“

“And don’t say it’s nothing because I could see your blush from outer space”

This only caused him to blush more. He didn’t know if any brighter shades of red even existed.

“We were just talking. Wait is he…Never mind.”

“Not never mind! He was totally checking you out! I’m so setting you two up.”

“I don’t even know his name”

“It’s Pedro,” she squealed.

It sounded right to him. Cool. Solid. Safe. And the thought of them seemed to make Meg happy so what harm could it do?

She kept talking but Balth wasn’t really listening. He thought he heard her say the name of a dinosaur or something. He tried to pay attention but his thoughts couldn’t catch up. There was only one thought on Balthazar’s mind.

Pedro.

**Author's Note:**

> So yeah, someone (I think jokingly) requested a pedrazar stripper au a while ago so I started writing this. It never had an ending and I kind of forgot about it but I decided to finish and post it in honour of Pedrazar becOMING FRICKING CANON DAY! So yeah, I hope you liked it and please comment any constructive criticism or compliments or anything.


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